And I want to live in my dream

*waves* I know, I know. You're probably thinking: "Where that heffa at?" LOL. Well after Chistmas and concussions also New Years and nose bleeds, 2008 ended kinda weird.



Well, with that said, lets continue to todays post.



"There would be no black and white, the world just treat my wife right. We could walk down in Mississipi and no one would look at us twice."- Dreamworld by Robin Thicke



I finally had the chance to listen to my new Robin Thicke CD. If you dont know who he is, google his name and listen to a bit of the music. He's beautiful and has a beautiful voice. :)



Well while flipping through the songs, I stumbled into Dreamworld, a truthful song about wanting something that most dont think is possible. I sat and listened to it at least three times. What he said in this song make the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

The song basically expresses, quote above also, his wanting to live in a world where life can be lived and there wouldnt be any problems, no racism or shame.

So this entry will be about my and Jay's relationship...an interracial relationship.

Now, now. Some of y'all are thinking: "So what? There are many of those around so what makes this blog any different?" Honestly, ever since I've been reading this entry for a while and I'm still deciding what I should say.

Well, everyone knows how Jay and I met and how we got to this, however, theres so much to it then just being in a relationship.

I knew when Jay's family found out about us, shit would hit the fan. Here's this girl they didnt know about and the cherry on top is she's not one of us. There were times I knew they wanted him to break up with me but my beloved has this "I dont give a fuck about you think" chip implanted in his brain.

I have to admit, when we first started dating. there was this little voice inside my head (not the regular residents that live in my brain. just a guest.) saying it wont work. Saying that he doesnt really love you, its just a fling. He's just doing something to piss off his family. However, my fears were taking the best of me and I almost broke it off a few times. Once, I was so depressed from my fears of this relationship, I had a minor breakdown.

I started slowly to face my fears and they began to go away but in someway as always, something brought them back.

At one time, Jay and I were discussing marriage was I was helping my cousin pick out her invites. As we were talking this, I had to ask. I had to ask him how would his people re-act to us getting married. First there was this pause and that was one of the longest pauses I've ever been apart of. Then, he just smiled and said "Fuck 'em."

It seems that once Jay and I because closer, the more drama would start. First, it was the stares, then the judging and the best part, trying to talk to the couple into dating their own race again. If I can get a quarter everytime I heard something like: "Why are you with him?" "What can he do for you?" "What are ya'll going to do when ya'll have kids?", I would be chillin at Bill Gates's house cooking gumbo with his wife.

Well, I gotta cut this short. My eyelids are fluttering. Please come back for part 2